The complexity of being an LGBTQIA+ Jew

I recently told a colleague that I specialize in working with the LGBTQIA+ Jewish community. She responded, “That’s quite a niche.” For some people, it is difficult to believe that such a population exists in any sizable way, let alone that this population has specific needs that require knowledge and expertise to meet. 

While building my business, I’ve worried on numerous occasions that it is detrimental to specialize because I am limiting my clientele, but I am slowly learning that the people I want to serve are looking for me. Many of them have not found me yet, but my presence as a college counselor with this particular specialty is important. 

I am interested in working with LGBTQIA+ students who are not Jewish and vice versa, but I am particularly interested in the intersection of the two populations. It is a complicated place to exist, especially now. There is more nuance here, but to put it simply, the community that is the most enthusiastically, unquestioningly supportive of queer and trans folks is also the community that is the most enthusiastically, unquestioningly anti-Israel. Many people on the progressive left believe wholeheartedly that Israel–as a political entity, country, population, and culture–is morally corrupt. Anything remotely associated with Israel is tainted.

To understand how this can impact the LGBTQIA+ Jewish community, look at the 2017 Chicago Dyke March, where Jewish participants were kicked out for carrying Jewish pride flags. Organizers said that the flag bore too much resemblance to the Israeli flag and therefore made the space unsafe for participants. For the record, the Israeli flag has a blue Jewish star in between two blue horizontal lines on a white background. The Jewish pride flag has a Jewish star in the middle of the regular rainbow flag. This is clearly not an Israeli flag, but according to the organizers of this event, anything remotely associated with Israel, including the Jewish star, is tainted by Israel’s moral corruption. 

After this antisemitic incident, the Chicago Dyke March doubled down with more antisemitic behavior. In 2019, the DC Dyke March followed suit and banned the Jewish pride flag. While I understand and appreciate the desire to create a safe space for Palestinian folks, banning the Jewish pride flag is antisemitic. Judaism existed before the State of Israel, as did the Jewish star as an emblem. It is antisemitic to vilify and prohibit expressions of Jewish culture because of Israel’s political actions. 

For the progressive left, the boundaries between advocating for marginalized people and alienating Jews were already murky in the 2010’s, and things have escalated since the beginning of the Israel-Hamas War. Antisemitic rhetoric couched in pro-Palestinian advocacy is more commonplace and more socially acceptable than before. In all of the journalism about antisemitism on college campuses, I keep on encountering the same sign in photos from campus protests, and it floors me every time. The sign says “By Any Means Necessary.”

Whether it is coming from either side of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, the idea of advancing a nation’s interests by any means necessary is inappropriate and harmful. Isn’t “by any means necessary” the very philosophy that these folks are protesting?

We know that campus groups have condoned Hamas’s October 7 attack, so it’s entirely plausible that this sign is advocating for the obliteration of the State of Israel, which housed 42.9% of the world’s Jewish population as of 2023. And this is just one example of the rhetoric that folks on college campuses and in other progressive spaces have encountered since October 7.

I wouldn’t say that every member of the progressive left supports this rhetoric, but you’re more likely to see it there than many other places. You’re also more likely to find consistent, uninhibited, full-throated support for the LGBTQIA+ community, unless the LGBTQIA+ community in question is somehow associated with Israel.

So, where does this leave LGBTQIA+ Jews? Some of our most fervent allies can sometimes turn out to be fervent antisemites. It puts us in a complicated position. I don’t have any answers, but I will say that navigating the world as an LGBTQIA+ Jew requires a deep appreciation for nuance. I will also say that it can be hurtful. There are many instances, such as those at the Chicago and DC Dyke Marches, that can feel like betrayal. At the same time, I am grateful to the members of the progressive left that advocate enthusiastically and tirelessly for those at the fringes of society. 

I understand deeply and acutely how being an LGBTQIA+ Jew can come with a complicated set of challenges and emotions, especially amid the current culture of campus activism. I understand the richness and complexity of being an LGBTQIA+ Jew, and I am excited to help prospective college students who are looking for someone who gets it.